The past few days have been more than I expected, or wanted. But, I should finish up my first story before I get into that.
We went to Mary Lou's house one evening. Although I've never been close with any of her family, they've always been there and are my parents' friends. I like being around them. Everyone seemed happy to just be able to sit around and goof off for a while. Ricky and I tried to make some no-bake cookies, but they didn't turn out right. :[ It was fun to bake in Mary Lou's kitchen though. I would like to have a kitchen like that someday. There's only one wall that separates the kitchen from the dining room and there is a big opening like a window, so even when you're in the kitchen, you aren't cut off from everyone. And that means less people have to be in your way when you're cooking! You can just kick them out to the other side!
Shannon and Amanda came over one day and we attempted to play Munchkin. It took me a while to get used to it, and I don't think Shannon or Amanda ever caught on completely. When Amanda asked what it meant when the card said she gained a level, we didn't know how else to respond but to stare at her for a moment and explain that it meant she gained a level. It's a fun and silly game that I'd like to be able to play again sometime now that I know what I'm doing. I was ready to sabotage Kristi, but didn't get the chance. Till next time...
He got to meet Jill one night. We went over there along with Kristi and Baby Junpei (PS3) and got updates, Folded, downloaded some games and trailers, and roasted marshmallows. We sat around the fire on the cool night and watched the flames flicker and light up each other's faces. Dark nights, warm fires, cool breezes, and friends. Who could ask for more?
We went to the fair one night to watch the demolition derby. We also walked around and watched Julia poke at the chickens. I bought cotton candy. :] And Ricky turned into corn.
Hahaa... we watched Monty Python. I'd only seen clips before. Hahaha...
We went to the mall after dinner with my parents one night and I showed him what is left of the mall. Part of it anyway. We just went into the pet store and looked at fish and spiders.
We went grocery shopping a couple times :D
Towards the end of his stay he met the majority of my family. Asher and Erika came up for the weekend so everyone wanted to come to meet Owen. There were lots of children around. It wasn't terrible though. I was wiped out after the first wave because it was so sudden, but when Jenny and Jodi were up with their kids it wasn't so bad. I think I'm better with kids now. I'd never been able to handle kids before, but now I feel like I'm able to communicate with them. Before, I never knew what to say. Kids aren't so bad.
That about wraps things up I think. It was a great week. It exhausted me, and it exhausted Ricky even more. After seeing him off at the station I couldn't go home right away, and when I did get home, the house was empty. The next couple of days were ... hmm... not terrible, but not good. The months that we spent apart weren't so bad to me. But after he was here for so long it was weird to be alone again. Seriously, I was going a little crazy.
And guess what? He left on monday and then I drove out to Syracuse to bring my mom to the eye surgery place on Thurday. I also saw him that day.
Now begins a whole other story.
I never imagined that that day would be so long and full of... a lot of things. The boring part is what we were there for. I drove all the way to Mattydale which was actually fun. I liked being able to drive the long distance. Mom and I spent a long time at the eye place and she had to go in and out of offices all morning. Around 1 we got a hotel room in which I sat around and watched Burn Notice while I waited for mom's surgery to end. That was the boring part.
When mom was settled into the hotel (which was extremely boring for her) I drove out to Syracuse to pick up Anthony who was playing in the road with one of his brothers (he introduced me to two of his brother as Mario and Luigi. I can't remember their real names) and then went out to Never Neverland to kidnap Ricky.
Seeing him again was weird, actually. It almost seemed too ordinary. I don't even think that's the right word. It was like, "Oh, I remember you". It could have just been me. I think I just missed him a lot.
Roji's was fun. We all went out for tea. They rearranged the rooms again, so I had to get used to the environment again. Tomomi wasn't there, which was too bad, but I'll see her again eventually. They were out of taro at the time so I got strawberry instead. The guys were so silly. I got a little hysterical a couple times and laughed to the point of crying. I guess that should have told me something.
On the way back I got lost. I don't even know how that happened. I've directed people around Syracuse plenty of times and never given bad directions. I don't know where we ended up or how we got back, but I started freaking out about then. I'm usually fine with getting lost. I just ... get unlost. It's great. So, I'm not sure what happened then.
Stopped at Han's and saw the Han's lady again. I wish I knew her name. I keep wanting to tell people that we're on a first name basis, but I really don't know her name at all and she doesn't know mine. Ari and I just went so much that she began to get to know us. About school and family. We even saw her when we went to the Secret Garden which she apparently owns as well.
When we left Han's it was already dark out and I guess the city lights were too much for me. After dropping Anthony off at his house I started getting really nervous. It felt the same way as when I would try going to school on those days I was sick because of dairy. I stopped at the Wegman's parking lot and panicked for a while. Paced around and convulsed until we walked around inside the store for a while. It was really terrible. After a while I felt like I was calmed down enough to be able to drive again. I didn't want to, but we were stranded otherwise. From this point to the next I can't remember much.
The next point was when I hit the limit of...whatever. Panic attack peak, I guess. I had to pull over and get out of the car. After that I knew I couldn't do anything. Couldn't drive at all. I called mom fully aware that she couldn't do anything for me, but I didn't have anything else I could do.
This is basically how the conversation started...
"Mom, I'm-"
"I'M SO BORED"
"Mom, I'm having a panic attack."
"I can't watch TV"
"Mom, I'm having a panic attack. I can't drive."
".........okay."
Apparently she thought I said I was in a cabbage patch and couldn't drive. I crouched down on the side of the road to talk to her and everytime a car drove by I thought it was aiming for me. I couldn't do anything even thought I felt like that either. I've never been so convinced that something was going to kill me and yet I couldn't do anything for myself. Mom ended up talking to Ricky for a little while and in the end Ricky ended up driving me back to his house. Just not having to drive made me feel better. And Ricky is a great driver. :D
I called mom from his house and we decided that me trying to get back to Mattydale was a bad idea so staying there for the night would be best. That made me feel better. It made me feel safer.
His parents were perfectly fine with that, and his mom especially was understanding. She's had panic attacks and said how much it sucked. We could definately relate.
Ricky and I went outside for a while so we could walk around. I felt a lot better because of the fresh air and movement. Talking about non-sick related things was good too.
You know what? The stars are the same no matter where you look up at them from.
We ended up going to John's house, then to Mike's, then back to John's and back to Mike's. Although it was hard to see, Ricky assured me that the lake was beautiful and later on Mike confirmed that fact.
After we found John, who was at his house the whole time, we walked around with his dog that got kidnapped. Nick, the guy I was never expected to meet, came around in his car and drove off with John's dog. It was great. Then we lost John. He ran off trying to catch Nick and we didn't see him again until Nick drove around yelling at him with his car speaker thing. That was the best part of my day.
I also got to see Mike's monster of a dog, listen to him play the piano, and walk around with Ricky in the moonlight.
John(I think) rummaged through Mike's cupboards and pointed out that the oreo's were always stale or overly bendy. "Whoever opens them last never closes the package again." For some reason, that really sticks in my mind and makes me laugh.
Unfortunatly, I started feeling pretty sick so we made a quick escape back to his house. The rest of the night was really rough. I'm just going to give you the surface since it actually makes me qweazy to relive it in my mind. I fell asleep for half an hour, woke up in a panic feeling like I was going to vomit, screamed for a second out of pure hysteria, and ended up running outside in the dark. Just so everyone knows, I get really crazy when I'm sick like that. I bit my arm and discovered a bad bruise from it today. I bit my fingers a lot too, but no damage was caused.
I slowly inched my way back into the house, starting with spending half an hour in the garage praying and trying not to freak out. I considered trying to sleep there, but it was too cold. Made my way inside and fell asleep on the steps until I realized I was drooling. That always seems to happen. I can get to sleep when I'm not trying to, but when I do try I just get sick again. When I got back to the room I tried to get to sleep again, but this time sitting up in the corner of the room. Laying down is always something I can't do when I'm like that, but I also get so tired that I can't stay awake either. It really causes a bad conflict in my body.
I eventually got to sleep and slept the remainder of the night. 4 hours. That's something I never want to have to do again. But I don't think I could have been in a better place. If I was back at the hotel I wouldn't have been able to fight it like that.
The next day was hard to start. Mom hadn't eaten since 1 the day before and I had to bring her some food. I couldn't do anything myself, but I was afraid to wake Ricky up. It was only 7 AM. It had been a long night and I felt bad about having to pester him about everything. I didn't know if I could drive back to the hotel, so he came with me. It took a while to figure out directions, but we managed to get back even through all the traffic (it being the morning rush). After getting there and taking a shower I felt a lot better.
Mom had to go back to the eye place for a checkup so Ricky and I stuck around in the waiting room. Poor guy. It was really early.
We drove around and went to some stores for the rest of the morning. Something weird happened towards the end though. Ricky started getting a little crazy in the store. Not sure what that was about. Apparently green tea makes him hyper? But then he got really quiet again when we go back to the car. I wanted to be able to talk to him before we left and at the very least thank him for everything he did for me, but I never got the chance. He told me not to feel bad about everything, but there was no way I couldn't. When mom and I got back to the car I just sat in the driveway for a while. It was so hard to leave like that.
Well, that's the end I guess. It was a great and terrible two days in Syracuse.
It was great to see Anthony. It was great to spend a lot of time with Ricky, regardless of feeling like poop the whole time. It was great to wander around in the dark with him and his friends. I hope we can do that again.
"Lisa, you have plenty of opportunity. Don't muff it."
"Muff?"
"I just invented it."
Feeling down today.
-Lisa
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