A little something made of metal

Again I'm stowing away for a bit at a friend's house for net use and can only leave you with an entry pre-written. As I've said many times before, I am going to get back on track with my usual entries including images and memory spots. Until then, please be patient with me.

Please remember that the second half of my post was written over a week ago.

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~Watch out for Steambot spoilers everybody ~
After playing as many RPGs as I have from my childhood till now, I find myself to be a fairly good judge of what makes a decent game. The average playtime for an RPG is around 50 hours, so by that you can generally tell when you are nearing the end of the game(if you couldn’t tell from the plot). To play for about 20 hours and then have an abrupt, unnecessary ending, I find that a bit… unsatisfactory.

For the past couple of days I’ve been playing Steambot Chronicles, and RPG that I was quite excited about when I first picked up the paddle. I was indeed fascinated with the personal gameplay in which even the very first line was decided by you. I find this thrilling actually to be able to build your own character in a game. Even if he still seems to turn out the same either way.

The music theme was also impressive. Just the fact that the whole music scene was incorporated the way it was was interesting and quite fun and addicting. I enjoyed playing in the streets for crowds more than battling in the arena. Not to mention that each instrument was very realistic in its handling. I was shocked when I first “tickled the ivories” and found that the way you operate it with the paddle feels like you are actually playing the piano. It was interesting to try out different instruments and find your niche. I especially enjoyed the cello and violin.

That’s basically all I can say for praise now. The “non-linear adventure” has ended for me, and I can’t say I was too pleased with the ending. Since it’s non-linear, I’m wondering if it must be one of those bad/good/best/weird ending type games. I hate those. If it is, I must have gotten the crazy, doesn’t really have anything to do with the game – ending.

Okay, really people, stay away because I’m giving everything away for a while.

The ending seemed to revolve around Dandelion and Savory, two characters I almost NEVER talked to or even saw in the game. Dandelion seemed like a mature young man who kept to himself, not because he was the crazy psycho type, but just because he was a busy guy who enjoyed his work. It’s true! As for Savory, she was in the band. Basil had some huge crush on her, and that was basically it for her existence. Chicory was thrown in on the side only when there was nothing else to do. Eventually you discover that Chicory knew Coriander (boyfriend? You never really find out) and was killed when he was waiting for her at the station. Mallow kicks him into the road, splat, he died, no one helped, and Dandelion, Chicory’s brother, is distraught.

Again, that’s basically it for that story. Up until the 20th hour (I played for roughly 21) I thought that Chicory would be brought up later into some bigger story, but I didn’t expect it to all be thrown in a blender for the last fifteen minutes to completely kill all other aspects of the plot.

Mallow tried to apologize to Coriander too, but she wouldn’t have any of it. After that sorry attempt he just fades into the background and we never see him again. He was supposedly Vanilla’s friend, although we don’t know where they met, how they became friends, and why NOBODY REALLY CARES VANILLA HAS AMNESIA! Did anyone else notice? Through the whole game I kept wondering if anyone was going to try to help me out at all. No, they just kept saying, “Ooooh, Vanilla, will you do me a favor?” Sure, let the lost, amnesic kid do all of the work. I haven’t got anything better to do!

Why were Vanilla and Mallow on the ship in the first place? Is there any significance in Connie’s mother’s illness? They built that up right at the beginning like there was going to be something important there, but that was another story that faded away. Does the necklace that was Chicory’s that was Mallows that became Vanilla’s have a purpose? Didn’t really think so. Does Fennel have any significance in the story? He showed up at the end to scold me for being a good-for-nothing, and then disappeared. He didn’t even make an appearance for the Grand Finale.
There’s one really funny thing about the end though. Besides the girl falling in front the guy to protect him (and gets killed for no reason) being so clichéd (this leads me to believe there was something sweet between the two, something that the game designers failed to tell us beforehand, leaving us dry-eyed and confused), did anyone even HEAR the gunshot? That was the WORST gun SFX I have even heard in my LIFE! Hoho… funny.

Continuing with my questions…

Why in the world did Dandelion want to kill me? Why did they kidnap Coriander and Mallow and put them on a blimp? Why didn’t Dandelion go after Mallow and his father instead? Was there a point to giving gifts to Connie if the game would end without anything really happening between the two? Through the whole game you’re built up to believe that they like each other (if you play that way and not like a snob or money-grubber) but then, like most other things, that gets dropped into a bottomless pit when Savory shows up. I’m assuming that Dandelion and Savory were in love, or at least Savory loved him because otherwise she didn’t seem like she would have wanted to destroy the world for herself.

Maybe it was because there were mountains of extra things you could do in the game that I didn’t do that made it seem so short. I was more interested in the plot than the stock exchange or digging up fossils. I kept thinking that towards the end of the game I would get around to doing some more exploring, but I didn’t really get the chance. It was also deceiving because at the beginning the city is taken over right away by some crazy group, so I thought that when it happened a second time it was just another step along the way to the real story.

Maybe I played wrong. Once I get to an internet source I’m going to look up a couple things to see if there really is a different ending. For now I’m in the end, cleared mode where I can look around and finish up some things after-the-fact. I’m doing the wild goose chase looking for Connie. I wonder where Vanilla went on the ship when he left. Where could he have gone? Unless he remembered who he was without telling the rest of us. He returns a year later with the same clothes on and the same food in his pockets! Apparently when you’re overseas you don’t have to pay rent but you don’t collect on stock either.

I was hoping that the flying Trotmobile would save some travel time… but I didn’t really get to use it. So many things are left unanswered and so many things were unnecessarily thrown together. I think the designers must have been so concerned with the music part and the extra fossil digs and bus station systems that they forgot they had to make a decent ending.
Perhaps I’ll have to make a retraction when I get some more info and play the after-ending a bit more. Until then, I’m leaving the console off for a bit and I’m going to let myself be disappointed for a while.

It did get a little depressing when I went to visit Dandelion’s apprentice, Tonio. The music was very sober and he said some… well, sad things. I don’t even remember what he said. But it was all ruined when I went to the gravesite and prayed, and for every prayer it gave me the same response! “Your prayer remains unanswered” Peh!

“I’m perfectly sane! I just want to destroy the world! Ahh hah hah hah!”

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Here are just a couple quick updates on what has been happening with me this summer. Again, I don’t have regular internet access, so it’ll be short and I probably won’t be able to update again until I get to college.

Actually, I’ll be leaving for college the 25th and classes start the 27th. That’s all I’ve been thinking about lately and I’m getting really nervous. I’ve always been quite content with the idea of being a college student. Mostly because the majority of my friends had all been in college and I have always seemed to be able to handle that atmosphere. But now that I’ve gotten to that point, they are moving on … without me it sometimes seems.
In other words, I miss Emily a lot.

I also feel like all people my age are absolute freaks or idiots. No matter how old I become, I’ve always liked the older crowd. Hopefully that will change when I finally meet new people.
Enough of that. I have to rush a bit because the girls are coming over at 10:00 for practice. We’re recording 5 projects starting on Monday of next week. It just hit me last night that that is a lot and we’re not ready at all. We had such a late start on them this summer and we didn’t actually start practicing until the middle of July. All we’ve had is 1 month to practice so we’ve been trying to get together twice a week. Although we’re … okay… we really stink at the same time.

We haven’t had any time for lyrics either. It’s going to be another one of those fumbled dances with fumbled words. My favorite.

I can’t say I’m not proud of them though.

I haven’t had much time to practice myself, which has really been bringing me down. At practice I can’t really help anyone out because I can’t even do my own steps. If we only had another week… Passion is what I’m really nervous about. How in the world can I learn those breakdancing-esque steps in a week? Sam knows her part pretty well so I feel kind of like a failure. I have to know it be next Thursday!

I still have four sets of costumes to finish… one set I haven’t even bought the material for.

It hasn’t helped that I’ve had weddings to record. I’m actually quite pleased with how Christie’s video turned out though.

I got two wedding jobs this summer to record and fancy up the wedding and receptions. One down, one to go. Miss Adamsen’s wedding scares me though. It’s going to be much more formal than Christie’s was, so I’m terrified actually. Her wedding is Saturday.

I wonder if there’s anything else I can say? That’s basically all that has been on my mind lately. College, projects, and wedding.

Isn’t the weather nice? I’ve been swimming a lot lately. Ahh… what a nice way to start August.
The middle of August is what I’m really looking forward to. For two weeks I’ll have nothing to do but edit bucket loads of videos. But at least I won’t have to go anywhere. Wouldn’t be nice to just have a day to relax? This summer seems to have been absolutely packed full and just crazy!
Asher has a job that he can use his artistry with now! For two weeks he’s going to be drawing coloring books for Dreamworks’ new movie, “Bee.” Is that the name? I’m excited and so is he.
I’d better wrap this up quick. Was there anything else?

Oh, I’m going to be getting contacts Monday. Hopefully. The doctor is kind of kooky so I hope he gets the right prescription. That’s the problem Kristi had so she didn’t end up getting them. The ones I put in during the learning session were great. I hope he didn’t change them. Getting those suckers in is a real pain. But getting them out is even harder. Goodness.

Sometime last week my Sunday School class went to a lake and we played in the water and had lunch, all the beachly type of things. Colette even brought a parachute. Yep. She said she got it at a garage sale just for fun. It was fun too. Everyone grabbed a set of rope and pulled while the wind was captured underneath it. Hah, it was a sight! We had plenty of spectators too.

Candy, Sam, and Bentley all tried my bubble tea and detested it. I figured they would, but I wanted to see their faces. (I love my bubble tea set! It makes me really sick because of the tapioca, but I drink it anyway.)

Trudy rolled in the sand when she was wet. “Hey guys, watch this!” What a clown. Then her Shannon and Candy proceeded to chase me into the water and throw me in.

Well, kids, that’s all for story time now. I’ve got places to be and plenty of work to do.

Memory 7 – Yellow for playful

I’ve been thinking about Jillian a lot lately because she left again this summer for the continentals. I wasn’t the happiest person alive when she left without saying a word to me, but I guess she had other things on her mind.

There’s this game we used to play on her porch when we were little and used to be around each other quite a bit more than we are now. We would sit on the porch swing and watch cars go by. She’d pick three colors and I’d pick a different three. For every car that went by that was one of our colors we’d get a point. I don’t know if we ever really kept track of the points or when we decided on a winner, if we did at all. That was a good game though. We’ve had some good times on that porch. I’ll tell you next time.

-Lisa

An Update

I'm at Shannon's house right now borrowing the wireless connection from next door. I don't want to spend too much longer here though because ... well, I didn't exactly ask to come into their house.

From the looks of it we won't get any net service until at least september, and by then I'll be at college anyway. So I guess I'll just be making special trips around town to sit in the car and "borrow" some wireless all summer.

Here's a post I wrote a few days ago and saved waiting for an opportunity to get it published. I'm going to malone this afternoon, and possibly tomorrow too so I might be able to update then also. See you!

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I am currently typing from my brand new Toshiba laptop. Her name is Haru and she is a model Satellite A205, with and Intel Core 2 CPU T5300 @ 1.73 Ghz. If you care about all of these crazy numbers, it also has 2038 MBs of RAM and a 32-bit operating system. The best part is the 200 GB drive.

The first day was just the initial set-up, but by the second day I had the drive completely full. Most people looked at me with this disgust in their eyes and asked how in the world I could have so much junk to put on a brand new machine. Most people also don’t realize how much room raw video takes up. The first 100 GB was the “It’s Not Too Late” movie footage with the complete three performances and the many hours of filming. That’s what I really wanted in a laptop. Room to work. It’s much easier to work when the files are in front of you and not on a separate drive or disc. That’s a real pain.

I wish I could check my blog so I could see my list of things I was going to talk about. I think I can remember a few things. It’s about time I wrote my thoughts down. My internet is still out of commission so I’ll be typing this, probably for several days, and then uploading it when I get around to someone else’s house. In my complaints section (yes, I need to make a section for that now or I might go completely loony) I will definitely list that among others. It’s prevented me from a lot of work that is desperate to be finished. But I’ll leave that for later.

The Word program I’m using is very fancy and quite pretty, but it’s missing out on some good old fashioned Word features. I wonder if I just haven’t set them up right.

For days I’ve had so much to say and write about, but it’s always when I finally sit down to get things in order that I forget what I was about to say.

Mom and I have been watching Fushigi Yuugi for the past couple of weeks. Right now we’re in the 30’s somewhere. Taiitsukun just told Miaka she had to sleep with Nakago to get the Shinzaho back. This is one of the scenes I would have preferred to skip. Of course, I know the outcome, but I have to wonder what Mom is thinking. I’m basically content with watching this with her though. I don’t quite know how to describe this. I guess I’ll just say it this way. There are some naughty scenes in the 52 episodes, something that is a little hard to be avoided when one girl is traveling with seven men. But I’m not worried about those scenes because I know my mom won’t judge me about them. She’s not going to say something like, “Goodness, what kind of movies do you watch!” She knows me. That’s the best way I can put it. Anyway, she really likes the series. That makes me happy. I love watching anime with her. Right before this we finished Now and Then, Here and There. Wonderful!

Friday night I graduated from highschool. I was going to put that first on my list on things to blog about, but I’d forgotten already. The ceremony was actually decent. Although, I did space out a couple times, I managed to stand up whenever I was supposed to. I did walk the wrong way after getting my diploma though. Stupid girl. I got a few awards too. I really wasn’t expecting any, but once I received a few I was secretly and greedily hoping for more. I think I got four, mostly for creativity. All for creativity actually.

All in all, it was relatively short and painless, the complete opposite of the rehearsal. I was totally ready to leave that awful place and those obnoxious jerks by the end. While others cried through the whole thing, I couldn’t stop twitching, anxious to get out of there.

My grandparents even went to see me. I was happy about that. That’s something that was on my list to write about. My grandpa. A while back he was diagnosed with cancer, but he underwent surgery and several treatments and it appears they got most of it out. It was a tumor on his brain I think. Well, sometime after everything seemed somewhat okay, he had what appeared to be a seizure. I don’t know all of the details, but Nana called that night sobbing and I didn’t know what to do. That night was crazy and Grandpa had to stay in the hospital for several weeks I think. I never went to visit. Quite frankly, I didn’t want to see him skinny and weak. I wanted to remember him as gruff, cranky grandpa with an occasional laugh or smile at me. I didn’t want to see him old. Eventually I saw him when he got back home. Although he hasn’t talked much since then, he seemed basically alright when I saw him. He calmly would respond to me and smile.

We stopped by and saw them after the ceremony because they left right away. Grandpa was determined to open a plastic package with some kind of sweet in it, but couldn’t. Nana quickly opened it for him, but since he’d already gotten the scissors out, he figured he would do the job himself anyway and cut the package a little just to prove he could. I thought I would cry. I love him so much. I can see where I got my stubbornness.

My graduation party was actually a lot of fun. While the vast majority of the people were over 60 years old and I didn’t know their names, I enjoyed myself. I wore my pretty ebay/Chinese dress (I posted a picture a while ago when I was thinking about buying it). I wrote to the girl who sold it to me a complained about the skirt not being ruffled like in the picture, but she said something like, “Oh, pictures are always better!” But… the skirt was completely flat with only one thin cotton strip. The dress in the picture obviously had much more fabric and was not made from cotton. I like the dress a lot, but it’s clearly not the one I thought I was buying.

Right, back to the party. Several people showed up from school. That was nice. Some of them were over for Jill’s going away party too. Yvonne came up with the idea and somehow most of the responsibilities fell in my lap and the party was at my house. About ten out of the 40 people invited came, and we all missed when Jill came so the surprise part was really dull. That was kind of the second surprise for her. The first was at the I WISH recording. I baked her a cake and decorated it with cherry blossoms and wrote “Sayonara” on it. That was for graduating from Shojo Explosion.

The best part was watching Trudy play eyetoy. She’s so long and gangly she can’t control herself.

I gave Jill the scrapbook I’d been working on for several weeks. She really loved it. That was nice. I was kind of hoping she’d cry. Aren’t I awful?

I’m watching part of the Wonderful Hearts 2006 Summer concert and C-ute is singing something quite adorable. I’ve never kept up with them, and I doubt that I’ll ever be really interested. There’s one girl who gives me the annoying chills. She’s the tallest in the group and there’s no question that she has to be the eldest in the group considering her blossomed form compared to the rest. How old are those girls? 9-12? I wish I could go to a Morning Musume concert. The one I would have wanted to go to would be Yosse’s graduation. I’ve still only seen clips from that. After that, what I’ve seen from Morning Musume has be very disappointing. I haven’t been too obsessive since she left. It’s like she was the last thing tying the group together. After she left everything fell apart. I’m not against Chinese, but I wasn’t terribly pleased with the decision to bring in two Chinese girls to the group. It just doesn’t mix. I’m sure they’ll be great, but it’s completely changed the face or Morning Musume. I only hope that Kamei can fight against change and keep herself true.

Did a girl graduate from Berryz Koubou? Or was she sick or injured for the concert? In the extra part with Tsuji she’s there though. Hm, I wonder what happened. If I could get to the internet, I would check.

I have to wonder if Fujimoto will stay as the leader for long. She’s in another group too, so I don’t know how she can keep up with all of those responsibilities. Sometimes Miki makes me think of Leigh.

How long has Takahashi been there? She’s up to be the next leader. She’ll no doubt be a soloist when the time comes. I wonder what path Kamei is going to take when she graduates?
There have been so many changes in MM over the years, but now it’s getting kind of ridiculous. It’s like the agency feels like it has to change just because it always does. The member changes aren’t for any particular reason now, it’s just that it’s expected.

I know this isn’t all accurate, but it’s how it appears. The Chinese girls intervention wasn’t for the group, it was for politics. I guess that’s what really gets me. I wouldn’t be surprised if my interest in MM completely faded. The old days were the shining days, and now they have grown somewhat dull. I’m still not used to Koharu.

Did anyone else think that Mitsui’s arrival was really soon after Koharu’s?

Well, enough of that. Morning Musume will always have a place in my heart.
I’m having a hard time talking about anything interesting tonight, and it’s been so long too I should at least say something worth reading.

I’ll talk about college for a bit then.

I went to orientation last week and was so sick I just wanted to turn around and go home within the first hour or the trip. We stopped at a Walmart somewhere before Watertown so I could walk around for a while. It helped and I was mostly okay for the rest of the trip. When I couldn’t eat anything though I knew I would be sick that night.

The whole day was quite boring and very disheartening. Actually, I hated it. I did manage to talk to three people though. Well, two, if “Do you mind if I sit next to you?” doesn’t count.

The first girl was Molly. She was really nice and seemed like someone I could depend on, or at least talk to when no one else was around. She was completely lost on the financial aid section, as was I, so we found common ground quickly. She seems like she might have been a geek at her highschool, possibly even labeled as shy, so there was something else I could relate to. I was disappointed when we were separated to. I thought we could cling to each other throughout the day and help each other out.

Soon after Molly was taken away with another group, I met Gina. Right away she reminded me of Emily. I can’t even really pinpoint why, but that’s the way things usually go. Some of it was in the way she spoke. She has very dignified words and spoke with a clear head. I saw her quite a bit throughout the day, but I didn’t want to be overbearing, so sometimes I wouldn’t approach her, although during the Spanish placement test I found her again and we fretted over the test together.

The day’s activities ended and Mom and I rushed out to the shopping centers in which we were both disappointed. For some reason the mall wasn’t spectacular like it has been the first time. It was mostly escalators that lead to large, empty halls and three different kinds of cell phone and other electronics stores.

By the end I was totally drained and devastated. The day had been so awful, although I can’t really remember why. Perhaps it was the seclusion. After being around 60 people all day I felt so alone. I wonder if that was it.

This sounds sissy, but I was going to sleep in Mom’s room in those nice apartments. I blame my weakness on illness though. If I hadn’t been so sick I think I would have survived on my own. But by the time we actually found her room the door wouldn’t open. We stood there for a good ten minutes trying to get the card and key combination to work. In the end we decided that Mom would have to sleep in the dorm that night. Luckily I got a corner room with a single bed and a bunk bed. Unfortunately, that meant I would now have to sleep on the top bunk since my roommate had already claimed the regular bed with her Victoria’s Secret tote.

It was absolutely scorching in that room and I forgot to bring a fan. The window opened a good 5 inches and only on one side. I was glad that corner rooms have bathrooms because every couple of minutes I could go in the bathroom and drench myself with stale tap water. After we finally got settled I laid down and watched most of Howl’s Moving Castle, the whole time worrying about how my roommate would react to coming in and finding another person in the room. It actually terrified me. I already knew what I was going to say when she entered. “Hi, this is my mom. Her key wouldn’t work so she’ll be in here for tonight.” It was really simple, but every time I heard a door slam my stomach dropped, which wasn’t all that comforting that night.
I finally fell asleep for an hour, but my music woke me up. You come to a complete loss when even your music makes you sick. My roommate came in some time after that (around 1:30am. She must have been outside screaming with the rest of the floor) and my mom exclaimed, “Natasha!” For a split second I wondered what Natasha was doing here, but I came to my senses and gave the girl my rehearsed explanation. She was nice. I figured she would be, but I couldn’t control my fear. I probably should have done a lot more praying that day than I had.

After she came in I felt worse so I took my things and went out into the mini-lobby. It wasn’t really a lobby. Just a little opening in the hall with a couple chairs and couches. I sat on the couch and stared at the battered, tiled ceiling listening to the fledglings outside scream their little heads off. Eventually, Gina came strolling by and stopped to see what I was up to. I wished I could have told her I was sick, but I can’t even think of the word when I feel like that so I think I responded by just saying I was thinking. She sat across from me on the other couch which was quite a ways away which made me realize that we still really didn’t know each other. I felt like such a geek because I was in my bathing suit top and I was a total mess from feeling so ill.

Apparently, her roommate was still on her silly cell phone talking to what must have been at least every person in a small country and Gina had gone to watch a movie hoping the girly girl would be done by the time she got back. It turned out she was still on the phone though and went back to finish the movie. I didn’t see her when she came back up, but I felt a little better after talking to her and was able to fall asleep on the couch. Couches are always so nice, especially compared to those awful cots. I think I woke up a couple times and saw people walking by, but it might have been a dream since I don’t remember opening my eyes.

By the next morning, 6:30am, I felt the same. I couldn’t move for a while. As hard as I tried I just couldn’t get up. Eventually though I managed and got dressed. Mom was up before me so after I tried to compose myself (and taking a peek at my roommate who sleeps with her lips open but not her jaw) we walked outside for what seemed like forever. Around 8:00 we found someone who looked like she knew what she was doing and asked if we could somehow get my writing placement test done early so we could leave. I was speechless through the whole process of getting my test done and seeing my advisor early just because it was the easiest problem we’ve ever dealt with. The administration was so kind to me and took me in like their own child, wanting the absolute best for me. On my test they even had me write a note saying that I was ill so I would be scored lightly. I was ecstatic. I’ve never had someone take my illnesses seriously and caringly. Through my session with my advisor she would periodically ask me how I was holding up. All through highschool when I was ill they would just tell me to put up with it. I am so pleased with the administration.

After the placement test we hoped in the car and headed home (I hope I scored well on it. It wasn’t really my type of topic and it was only a 600 word essay, so I don’t know if I really developed my ideas all that well). It’s just like when you wake up to go to school. You can be feeling so totally wretched, but once you decide to stay home you begin to feel better. Well, I wouldn’t stop babbling until we got to Watertown. I even munched on some breakfast.

After that the trip had basically ended and I was happy again. I slept through a lot of the car ride which I felt a little guilty about because Mom was really tired too, but I couldn’t have driven even if I wanted to. I tried to help her stay awake when I was too. We generally just yelled out random things in an obnoxious tone to keep ourselves occupied.
I know I’m not going to be prepared this August. I always thought I was fully prepared for college. But… I know I’ll be homesick. It’s something that can’t be stopped. But I thought I was stronger than this.

Time for something to remember.

Memory – 006? Purple for nostalgia and orange annoyance

When I was very young I used to always be in the children’s choir at church. That night was always so exciting. I remember being in my red velvet dress and being in the cool car watching
the snow piles closely as we drove past them on the way home.

The concert was fun, although the only one I remember is when I was too young to sing in it but was a cow or donkey instead. I got bashed on the head right in front of everyone and got really mad. I suspect someone from the back was trying to get me to behave. It wasn’t really my fault I was whispering. Natasha was talking to me the whole time and I remember she was trying to bribe me with a cookie over something. After I was rudely attacked by whoever it was that hit me, I up and left the stage and sat with my mom.

It was the ride home that is the real nostalgic part. It was the coolness on my stocking covered legs and the frigid breeze as we walked out of the church. It was the ride home in the car when I couldn’t stop smiling because I was proud of myself for my accomplishment and my parents complimented me on my energy or cuteness. I would lean forward in my seat so I was almost right next to them and hold onto my legs as I smiled and listened to them chat.
I miss those chilly, chatty nights.

-Lisa

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Calm and Collective

Now that I've had some time to think and have more than 10 minutes to discuss I think I can almost safely give you some gory details about what's been going on with The Pair.(of underwear! -still a kid-)

Everything changed after I had my surgery, which part of me is particularly ticked with. Why is it that things change when you're unconscious?

Although Sam took the responsibility to ask her closest friends what they thought about her dating a guy, I think at the time we were looking at a different picture than her.

Do you like this painting?
Um, sure, why not?

We were foolish to think that we were talking about the same thing. She wasn't asking, can I date this guy, she was asking if we'd still be her friends if she did. I'm sure that was subconscious.

Even though I said I wanted to elaborate, I still want to keep this somewhat quick and simple. Quite frankly, I don't want to just spew my thoughts everywhere all over everyone and than regret it later.

Let's talk about Sam first, and I hate to be a gossiper, but if I can't get these thoughts out I might just melt into a smelly lump of coal.

Boys are boy and girls are girls. Seems to me that Sam thinks that because she's a Christian and he's a Christian that everything is supposed to be okay and that whatever they do it fine because they're serious.

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Whew, sorry about the sudden break. I didn't time myself very well and the period ended before I could finish. It's 11:49, May 23rd now. Let's see if I can wrap this up.

Now, where was I....?

I've been dumping on people lately to keep myself sane, and someone told me (two people actually), "It's hormones." It's true. I guess when people sit in the seat they feel like they have to drive, so they do what they're told. The thing that irks me is that she's told me several things that I think should be an obvious "NOT GOOD" sign, but I've never been able to understand how she sees things.

She said he told her he only started sitting with us at lunch is because he knew she wouldn't date him if they weren't friends first, so that's why he started being nice to her. That tells me that he didn't really care to be her friend before he got this bright idea, and he's just working by strategy to win her. To her he has more smarts than other guys who have asked her out.

Three days before Prom she was talking to me... she said they she did not want him to kiss her. I heard it. She said those words very clearly. I thought I'd die when I saw them sucking each others lives out. I guess she changed her mind.

That's the thing though. She just lets him do whatever he wants and doesn't tell him anything otherwise. I never really expected to see her sitting on his lap... ever. But it's a bit shocking when he's giving her a massage and they get in trouble for PDA when they haven't even been dateing for two months. Kids these days.

I've been skipping lunch lately because it's sickening to watch them stare at each other so shallowly and barely say a word. I keep wondering if they've noticed that I give them the cold shoulder whenever they're together. I don't think I've looked him in the face since the first performance of the play, and whenever he makes and effort to strike up a conversation, I shoot it down.

I wonder.

Which leads me to him.

I've never really liked him. He was tolerable before though. Eugh, I really don't want to go into that.

As I said, I try to avoid him as much as possible. If you asked him, "Do you hate Lisa?" of course he'd say, "No," but if you said, "Ugh, isn't Lisa a pain?" he'd shyly look around and say, "You think so too?"

"Do you like Lisa?"

"Not particularly."

I don't really care, I don't like him either. Sometimes when Sam has floated away from his ever present hands we're stuck in an awkward situation. Ever time he starts out with the same words...

"So, Lisa, what's up?"

And I very coldly respond, "Oh, nothing."

Then that is the end.

They're quite boring, just like any other highschool relationships I've seen. Maybe they don't realize that couples usually have something in common, or that they probably have to talk sometimes about things other than pain, sickness, and events. What about the things you like? What about your lives?

Oh, I forgot, you gave up those things to stare at each other. Sorry.

He really just keeps her all to himself. I let Sam know that I was upset about her leaving me at lunch and at my locker. Everyday before that we had walked together, and then without warning she is gone to walk with some gangly, slobbery boy. So, apparently another rule of highschool couples is that you can't walk with your boyfriend and your best friend at the same time. Not that I care now. I don't want to be near him.

When I talked to her about it she simply said, "Well, you're slow sometimes." I'm always slow, but that didn't matter to her until they became one.

His friends don't even like it. There are several different types of jokes. Some of those have truth to them, but are spoken in an atmosphere in which no one will take it personally. This is what his friends have been doing. "You know, you took my best friend away." or "I wish you hadn't changed so much."

You know what his responses to this were?

"I've matured, dude."

Barf.

What kind of retard says to his friends he's matured when he's just the same person he was the day before? How can anyone, with a sound mind, go up to someone and say, "I've matured." Isn't that just like a child saying, "I'm not a kid!!"?

Sometimes I imagine myself giving him a whopping fist in his face or chucking whatever I'm holding at him. I even plan it out sometimes. Like, I'll wait until this song ends, or I'll wait until the bell rings, so it won't cause so much of a hassle. But then there would be a lot to deal with afterwards, and I don't want to go through that.

He stole her away. She's his trophy. I don't know if he's really thinking this, or if it's just me seeing something in my eyes.

I hardly saw Sam at the Prom. The two of them were usually in the hallway, cuddling. Or if they finally found the dance floor again, he would wrap his slimy arms around her and pull her away from the group as much as possible. Then he trapped her and took her.

I wonder if she still wears her purity ring.


That's all the complaining for now. I'll really get back on track soon with everything less stressful. I just have to get over this bump first and get the internet back.

Sorry for all the strain. I'll be back in a couple days to tell you the good things about Prom and get that list done.


Surprise Going Away Party at my house, 2:00 for Jill. Bring food!

-Lisa

Blind Hormones

Gerald gave Sam a big, fat, ugly kiss at prom saturday night. Several, actually. Although I didn't see the first one, I heard that they didn't come up for air for quite some time.

Maybe I'll elaborate later if I get a chance.

-Lisa

Happy Birthday

Happy birthday Hiroto!

I've lost track of his age.

He likes dogs, so here's a picture of one.

Quickie

Oh boy, I'm going to have to rush. I'm on Mrs. Kemp's computer and she's going to need it for grades soon.

Gosh, I love this keyboard. Kemp's. So crisp and solid.

The internet at home had gone into a complete coma so I'll probably only be able to access the net from school from now on. It's sad to think that, but it's true. Pictures will be scarce and posts will be short unless I pre-prepare them.

I'm home from my trip now. It's so nice to be home and comfortable, but the trip was very pleasant and I'm going to treasure that memory for a long time. Looking back at it, there's very little that I would like to forget. Maybe the last two hours on the bus on the way home when evidently three people had very bad ... um... gas.

Other than that, I'm quite content with the outcome of the trip. Although I would like to go into detail, as I said before, I'm rushing this post.

There are only a couple things I want to say for now.

Now that the short vacation is over, I'm back to having a lot of work to do. The morning we were leaving Wanda called about the work I'm doing for her which I said would be done last week. That was uncomfortable and gave me a little more stress than I would have liked to have that morning. Over the trip though I forgot about everything I have to do and just enjoyed myself.

Now I'm swamped.

What a corny phrase.

I haven't told you about my Wanda experience yet, but again, that will have to wait, along with the trip and the whole list of things I have on one of my previous entries. Thoughts keep piling up and I want to get them out before I collapse.

Since the net isn't working at home I might get a chance to completely dedicate my time to Grease. Again, can't go into too much detail. All I can tell you for now is that I'm producing a video for the school musical that was performed in March. People keep pestering me about it askng if I have it done yet.

Honestly, I haven't touched it yet. All of the footage is finally uploaded, but I haven't even looked at them yet. Don't tell anyone.

Needless to say, I'm a little stressed out right now. I have ... four video projects going on right now.

Or was it five?

1. Wanda (bookcover)
2. Grease (video editing)
3. It's Not Too Late (movie recording, editing)
4. I WISH (practicing, recording, editing, etc...)
5. Seishun Jidai 1 2 3 (practicing, recording, editing, etc...)

Wah. Well, today it my early day, so hopefully I can get something done. Namely Wanda's book cover.

It doesn't look like Mrs. Kemp is coming over here any time soon, so I'm going to see if I can get my usual watermelon picture up. By the way, as soon as things calm down I'm going to get back on top of my Memories section.

Speaking of which, I really want to get back to writing. Not just blogging (that sounds so nerdy!), but actually fictional writing. Maybe I'll try to find my old creative writing assignment and see what I can do with that. I thought it was interesting anyway. I always had thing dream that I would get something published what I was 18. My dreams soar too high.

Kemp just told me I have an assignment due that I missed a few weeks ago. Perfect timing. Why didn't anyone tell me earlier?

Oh yeah, I'm very mad at Faye.

Lately there has been a fox around and a coyote. What irks me is that she doesn't mind at all. All of the other cats we've ever had came in when the sun went down and minded us and were nice. Faye's kind of mean and stubborn. Did you know that coyotes scream like girls? Not whimpy, but shrill, blood-curtling screams. The first time I heard it I thought that there was a girl being raped in our yard.

Well, last night both animals were outside, and so was Faye. Of course, she refused to come inside and instead went to go see what the fox and coyote were fighting about. They were probably fighting over which was going to eat her. Finally, Dad went outside and chased them away and scooped dirty little Faye up and passed her off to me. She tried to take my arm off coming inside and nearly knocked the wind out of me with all of her kicking.

So, I'm very mad at her.

I've seen enough death to last me forever.

Maybe Kemp is waiting for me to get off instead of kicking me off. That's the end for now then.

Work, work, work.


-Lisa

Oh yeah, Hiroto's birthday is tomorrow. <3

Day 2

Day 2, May 12, 2007. Hershey, Pennsylvania.


Ever since last night I'd been a little worried about our trip to the park today. Last night Sam and Kayla were having several mini spats because Kayla wanted to go about her gift shopping slowly, and Sam wanted to rush out and hop on rides. I didn't care much either way.

Today was generally smooth though. Sam was content because she had Jill to ride with, and Kayla was content with taking things slow. Of course, we weren't without annoyances and slight disagreements, but overall things ended in very loud laughter (There was so much chocolate in the air, by the end of the day everyone was somewhat high).

So, after a very long and hot day (I got a very bad sunburn, but I'm excited about the idea that I was out long enough for that), everyone is pretty tired and a little grouchy.

Hold on, give me my second to complain. Sam put AIM on this laptop and when she installed it she installed all of the extra crap along with it. It's quite annoying.

Also, Blogger is being freakish.

--End

So much happened today that I can't even make my mind stop long enough to get thoughts in order. It was a good day though, and that's all I really remember.

Isn't it strange how people act so differently in different situations? All day people have be acknowledging me and having almost whole conversations with me.

Okay, that sounds slightly emo.

But I'm serious. All of the boys on this trip stuck together, and whenever they saw us, they would come over and chat saying what rides they went on and asking us what we'd done. It was nice.

There was a water ride that Kayla went on with Jill and Sam and I stayed behind to hold things. It was the one where the raft things goes up a big track and drops the people down into the water gettings everyone soaked (there are usually people standing on a bridge waiting for the spray). At the end of each round the raft things circles the pool to get back to the beginning. Almost every raft towards the end of my wait was all people I knew. The funny things was that they all waved to me when they passed me on their round and smiled. Jeff even splashed water at me which was strange, but coming from him, not as much. For a second I had a thought in my head while watching a group of the boys pass by, saying hi. I thought, "Look at this. Look at all of these wet, buff, young, shirtless guys waving at me. Hah!" It was a funny thought. I thing I almost laughed out loud.

Kayla and Jill are in other people's rooms right now and it's only a couple minutes until 12 (rooms get taped off at 12 so the adults will know if we left after curfew). Kayla has been hopping around to all different rooms all night.

Oh, they just came in.

I should scram for now. Everyone is exhausted and we're going to be going to the Carousel Mall tomorrow. Around 100$ left. That's a little unbelievable. Someone I know is going to be complaining all day tomorrow. Euugh.

Here are some pictures. Only a few since I'm going to bed soon.

By the way, I don't know when I'll be able to give you an update on the rest of the trip since it appears that the net at home is basically obsolete.

-Lisa